First Impressions.

This is not a well known fact about me, but first impressions stick with me forever. Someones first impression determines how I see them for pretty much as long as I know them, for the most part. Unless, they really change my mind once I get to know them. I don't know if any one else is like this, but I really pay attention to the first few moments that I meet someone. How they are willing to be when they first meet someone really says something about them. I always try to make a good first impression when I meet someone and hope it was a good one. Whether its with a new potential friend, coworker, boss, teacher, or whoever, the first impression will always be a strong factor in any type of relationship. I tend to hate people who's first impression was such a bitch to me, and I tend to like someone who treats me with a smile on our first meeting. So if I'm bitter to you, and you really don't see why, think back to how we first met and ask yourself if it was a good first impression. Chances are it wasn't if I'm not very nice to you.

It's true what they say, you don't get a second chance for your first impression.

I felt like posting this up because its something that's been really going through my mind lately. I am currently in situations where I don't even want to get to know someone because their first impressions were that bad to me. Maybe I'm missing out on some potentially great people, but oh well. Sometimes those people who gave me bad first impressions randomly do something I think is nice and its like I don't even accept it just because I feel like they already messed things up. That's just how I am though. Sorry :\

Something I Think of Everyday,

"And ain't it shameful
how niggas blame hoes,
for given birth,
to a baby that took two to make.
Coward nigga you a fake.
How you gon' look in yo son's face and turn yo back,
then go start another family, dawg, what type of shit is that."

-J. Cole

Really late anniversary!

Was suppose to be on January 20th but i completely forgot, but it has been a year since i started this blog! happy anniversary blog, u know ur my only true way of venting and keeping me sane :p. damnnnnnn! now i can look back a year ago to the current date and see what was going on with me at the time. feels like just yesterday i was bored outta mind and decided to make this thing. cant believe i still do it haha. as a matter of fact, im like the only one that actually does still blog out of the people i follow -_-. everyone switched over to tumblr. ahh oh well.

one thing thats funny to look at is my post on valentines last year. funny because i ended up having a valentine that night last year. ahh funny funny. im sure some people can still relate to that one. although valentines was a few days ago too. damn im so late. fck my busy life! ahhhhh! back with some updates soon C:

So close, and yet, so far.

Once again, my conscious has won me over.
Everyone was telling me this.
"Let it off your chest,
it'll help you get over her.
If she rejects you,
than at least you know.
If something happens,
than it happens.
But just get it off your chest,
and it will do way more than bottling it up."
Okay I'll do it.
I needa get it out.
Let her know, that I understand what shes in,
but its just something thats been on my mind.
I planned it all out.
When and how I was going to tell her how I felt.
But then my conscious came along and told me;
"What's the point when you know
she's just gonna reject you?
What do you gain from that?
Fuck it, there's no point.
Sure you'll wonder "what if" for a while,
But what can you do?
Besides, she doesn't even notice.
Just let it go man,
time will let her fade."
You win.
Dammit I hate you.
But your right.
I can't do it.
Besides, I know I'm wasting my time.
So yeah...
I let her go...
But did I ever really have her?

This is the story of me coming literally THIS close to telling her what she will never know. Man I'm done with this.

C:

You know I'm there.

The lineup is Jay-Z, Trey Songz, Young Jeezy. I got two tickets, only need one. Tryna find someone to go with aside from the bunch of my friends that got the tickets with me lol. March 24th. Will you be there?

J.Cole is too good.

"Seems like I always had crushes on chicks I couldn't have
And then I end up fucking with someone I shouldn't have
See, in my mind, it's like I'm perfect for her, I gotta show her
But sadly, in reality, dog, I don't even know her
But still somehow she got my mind infatuated
Absolutely fascinated with the thoughts of what she might be like
Time after time after time I had to wait,
Is fate procrastinating?
I can take it 'cause I might be right, 'cause it's

Chorus (x2):
The girl of my dreams
Ay, is she good as what she seems?
Or am I lying to myself?
Ay, should I try and get some help?"