just friends

you ever have that one girl that you knew was right for you
and its obvious your right for her
but for some reason, it just cant happen?
its like at first, when you just met, it felt like you've known each other forever
everything just flows so right with her
that one girl you can be yourself around and she wouldn't mind.
later, you know all about her and she knows all about you and you guys are like best friends.
you feel like there's a thing going on between you two but in reality its only you
even if nothing was said between you two, it would still feel just right.
you're there for her whenever she got hurt from some other guys
saying "she deserves better" when you really want to say
"I'll treat you better then him"
but somehow she doesn't see it.
you're afraid she doesn't feel the same way about you so you never let it show.
why?
"why cant you give us a try?"
everything we need is right in front of us,
but she just wont take it.
you're afraid of losing that friendship you two hold
and secretly so is she.
you finally build the guts to tell how you feel
and in an attempt to keep your friendships
she says its "best if we stay friends".
but after that happens, it can never be the way it was.
and we end up losing what we tried to save.



how do we break this cycle here?

feedback!

hoyparre14: fool i hella feel u on that blog tho

hoyparre14: on yur blgospot tho

y not TOE KNEEE: which one

hoyparre14: ever feel like this

hoyparre14: that one lol

y not TOE KNEEE: ohhh fasho

hoyparre14: i was like wtf

hoyparre14: did i write this?

y not TOE KNEEE: hahahaha

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whoa! people actually read this! haha damn im shocked. that makes me feel good knowing he can relate and feel what im saying.

alright anyways, today was the day of the lil lunch! it was pretty fun and all catching up with her but i can tell its not a possible thing. so much for that. back to square one. i cant even think of any possibilities anymore. night yall.


btw, thanks for whoever reads this! hope im saying something to keep you coming back. i just put in this chat box on the right side of the page, anyone can leave a message. if you read my blog feeel free to leave one. no mean ones please? im sensitive haha

fix my heart

so i got a physical today and the lady said i have an irregular heartbeat, like an extra thump each time. whoaaa. hope its nothing serious. tomorrows the day, lets see how it goes. so far its not really goin so great

yayyy

such easy classes now. the lunch thing tuesday has been moved to wednesday. hope its fuuuun. my new speakers sound great, my new tv is very nice. lifes good right now. lifes goooooooood

ever feel like this?

have you ever thought about the person you have a crush on and just said to yourself "what chance do i have?"
i feel like that pretty often.
its like this girl can have any guy she ever wanted so what good am i?
honestly i dont think i have anything that sets me apart from other dudes.
i cant sing or dance or play any instruments.
im no sports all star and have the nice car.
i dont have an endless supply of shoes or anything like that.
i tend to get my hopes up too easy just to get shot down realizing its just me.
some would say i should think positive but this has happened to many times that i cant help but think like this.
some say im too nice but girls always say "i want a nice guy" hah yeah right.
then they just go fall for the dicks.
i dont know what it takes to get a girl anymore.
which is why ive been single for so long.
man tired of it.
but hey, nice guys do finish last.

yeah random thoughts in the middle of the night. happy new years to you asians out there. stay cool

$500+!?

damn so today i bought 4 new speakers for my car and a new hd tv. totaled over 500 D: oh well ill earn it back. its bouta be new years in china woohooooo. man im too tired to say much haha. oh for the lunch thing thats suppose to happen tuesday, iono about that one she hasnt contacted me on how its suppose to go down. im prolly just getting my hopes up for nothing like always. just play by ear now. im tired night yalls happy new years to you asians!

for the wiiin

got home from the warriors game against the cavs not too long ago and DAMN was it good! close game the whole time and it came down to a game winning buzzer beater from my fave player lebron james wooooooo! that was the highlight of my new year haha damn i loved it even tho im a warriors fan that was my fave player for the win right there! wooo. okay ionno what else to say i like bananas and turtles. cotillian practice tomorrow! night challs!

1 more semester

finals are finally final! lmao that was lame. well yeah finals are over and goodbye hard classes hello easy ones! today felt so good once the bell rung and school was out. after school we went to the varsity guys basketball game but got messed up again. afterwords we went to this cafe spot for some performances from students of our school, it was really nice and comforting. i saw an old friend of mine for the first time in a while and it felt pretty... different compared to how it was before. our past is a long story. anyways, i saw another friend of mine and she looked nice as usual and out of my surprise, she said we should have lunch sometime! whoaaaa pinch me im dreaming haha. well we set a plan for tuesday and i cant wait :]

CALCULUS IS DONE!

i survived! C- woohoo! thought i was gonna get a D haha. mannn the rest of senior years is gonna be so easy i cant wait. i wont be seeing this girl i kinda had a crush on as often but oh well she said she'll keep in touch and try to hang out with me haha hope that works out.

set it off

so this is how bored i am huh. i just decided to make this ionno why nothing else to do and i doubt anyone would read these things. man being home alone sucks, housemate moved out, chewys gone, moms working out of town, pretty much on my own. i would throw a party if this place was big enough lol. obamas day was today, pretty exciting. other then that my day was boring as usual. got finals tomorrow in calculus and im probably gonna fail that and gotta sociology presentation. cant wait for this week to be over. ill try to keep posts updated. later